And think not you can
Direct the course of love,
If it finds you worthy,
Directs your course.
Okay. Yes.. this blog post is about love….
Before I found it I was definitely just in love with the idea of love. You know the “ don’t look for it, it’ll find you” thing always bugged me because if the two people who are meant to love each other just waited and never made choices that could help start that love that means they’ll never find it right? (That’s a lot of loves haha)
Anyway, I’m the kind of person that would fight for it if I believed it was possible or if there was a 1% chance that I could stay long enough for a person to grow to love me. Not the best approach, its torture. (I’m meant to be revising lol) I have watched too many movies and yes I sort of believe in love at first sight or that your first could be the one. However, life played me. I had to learn the right way that I shouldn’t look for it, it should be there and in most cases like mine it was right in front of me. We would find each other but not when I was focused on finding him…something else would bring us together, we would be friends, then best friends, then lovers, then partners and then man and wife.. you know where I’m going…
(Okay…where is THIS going?) There are three things that I think would help if you think about finding the one toooo much. I know girls do this… ALOT. You have your height preference (silly), weight preference (that’s acceptable lol) and other things you’ve been thinking about thanks to life experience but the first thing is to be open minded…
Trust me… I knew I wasn’t going to end up with Brad Pitt or Denzel… when you find it, it is the personality and then appearance.. when you normally find someone who looks good and acts good and think they are the one… they are a douche. Being open-minded means getting to know the person first.. try and look past their face and body.. fall in love with their mind, their potential to be the man and woman you could possibly spend the rest of your life with. Not the sex, the money… no. I’m one to say sex doesn’t really matter because it can be taught. I don’t believe the kind of love between those who stay together forever because they want to can be. It must’ve been born with, and only that person can trigger it off (soul mates). Being open-minded really does help.. why put yourself in a box and happiness at risk because you want a partner that looks like a model but has a mind like a fish? Wake up… this is not the movies. Everything will NOT be okay just because you look good… Trust me, i fell in love with his mind and now he is the most beautiful person in the world.. he was just handsome before lol
The other thing is patience. Looking at my life plan.. I’m going to end up being at least 1 year behind schedule. (I was supposed to meet him when I was 16/17( which I did) date till we were 21 (that was three years late) and I am 20 now lol). I KNOW girls picture their future as soon as they sit down with a guy on a date.. ( do not lie!). And if there is no next date you’re really upset if it’s not your choice because you probably had the scene when you were meeting the in laws in your head. Take it sloooooooooooooooooow and easy. If it is meant to be it will be. Whether it takes three tries or more be patient with him or her. Baby steps… don’t crawl before yh you get it. You are both still growing and people change. You have got to be patient in finding it because you simply might not be ready. Focus on yourself and being a better person that can make not only yourself but future lover happy. Patience and wisdom go together. Don’t rush into anything. Think about it. It is your future. Patience also helps when you eventually do fall in love… “If you find true love, make sure you learn to keep it.” You have to be patient with them. Hear them out. Listen and understand. (I could go on all day)
The third and most important thing… learn to love yourself. When I was younger and I misbehaved, mother always used to say “ you obviously don’t love yourself because you are just making bad choices and causing stress!” I honestly used to think she was mad. Just mad. How can I not love myself? I do what I want when I want no matter what.. that must be love right? Doing what they want, when they want it, no matter what? I was stupid.. But not anymoreeeeeee J
Loving yourself is not just about you funnily enough. It affects everyone around you. Yes it includes making the right decisions, working hard not because of anyone but because of you. These choices will affect the lives of you and your loved ones. Loving yourself provides security. Men love secure women. Love yourself for everything that you are. Know that you are beautiful… if you don’t think you are change that! Gym.. learn about mascara.. do something. If it cannot be changed accept it and love it. Nothing worse than being with someone who is not supportive, has wandering eyes and taunts you with stupid questions like” what would you do if you found another girl in my bed?” -___- believe me . I have been asked that. Silly boy. But if you love yourself and are surrounded by good friends things like that wouldn’t affect you. Self love the centre of happiness, self-empowerment, and your ability to create love. We spend so much time waiting to be loved, hoping love will find us, searching, yearning for that special love but it all starts with you…
Okay.. I have to leave it there…revision..ugh (these are just my opinions by the way..) Suggest more things for me to blog about